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Accepting (and Defining) Reality

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In this episode of The Charged Life, high performance coach and #1 New York Times bestselling self-help author Brendon Burchard shares how our definitions and meaning of reality can impact our lives.

This is Brendon speaking freestyle, recorded in one take without prompter or notes.


Some people never accept reality. And perhaps that's a good thing, for what is real? If we aren't careful about how we define reality or attach labels and meaning to it, we can begin to drown in negativity and pessimism. People with personal power accept what is in front of them only after they have carefully defined its meaning for themselves. Learn how, get the full summary of this episode, and download the free podcast, all right here:


Brendon Burchard is one of the most followed personal development trainers of our time, and he is in the Top 100 Most Followed Public Figures on Facebook. A #1 New York Times bestselling author, his books include The Motivation Manifesto, The Charge, The Millionaire Messenger, and Life’s Golden Ticket. A car accident at the age of 19 inspired Brendon to turn his life around and follow his dreams to be a writer and trainer. After failing at first – he went bankrupt trying but he never gave up – he became a multimillionaire by the age of 32. Since then, he has dedicated his life to helping others find their charge and share their voice with the world.

Brendon's posts now reach more than 10,000,000 people per week worldwide. He is the star and executive producer of the #1 self-help show on Youtube, and his podcast, The Charged Life, debuted at #1 on iTunes across all categories in multiple countries. His seminars include High Performance Academy, the legendary personal development program for achievers, and Experts Academy, the world’s most comprehensive marketing training for authors, speakers, coaches, and online thought leaders. For these works, Larry King named Brendon "one of the top motivation and marketing trainers in the world" and SUCCESS Magazine named him in their Top 25 Most Influential in Personal Development along with legends like Oprah, Tony Robbins, Joel Osteen, Dave Ramsey, Deepak Chopra, and Wayne Dyer.

Meet Brendon at


The Charged Life is a weekly self-help show full of #motivation, #inspiration, and #high performance strategies with bestselling author, motivational speaker and High Performance Academy founder Brendon Burchard. Filmed in one take, without any notes or prompter, the show has become one of the most viewed direct-to-camera self-help series in the history of Youtube. It has also been the #1 Podcast in all of iTunes and is regularly in the top podcasts in Self-Help and Health categories around the globe. Subscribe to the free motivational podcast here:


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29 Comments on Accepting (and Defining) Reality

  1. Great advice brendon ! Inspiring as always 🙂

  2. It’s interesting, but there is a quote from ‘Winnie the Pooh” that comes to mind when I hear something like this. He said, “I’m not lost. I’m right where I’m standing.”
    My wife served me divorce papers tonight and we have three daughters. I have been in a lot of pain since then. This video helps at the moment.
    I hope the hope continues.

    • Christian Weatherbe // 19th January 2015 at 7:13 am // Reply

      Stay Encouraged!

    • Innovators Forum IFNetTV // 19th January 2015 at 2:42 pm // Reply

      +Christian Weatherbe …. Hey Christian, I feel your pain…. Ive had a divorce a few year ago as well and it was painful… We have two children… But like Brandon said, I learned to accept that situation for what it was, then I create a new reality which I am living right now. The process was hard but you will come through as well… I am praying for you and your family…. I hope your wife reconsider and change her mind, but if she doesn’t, you and your daughters will eventually be okay.

    • Hope you get through it ok!

    • Карина Восканян // 9th July 2016 at 10:40 pm // Reply

      But now you are free of marriage and you can create even better reality .

  3. Daniela Cunha // 19th January 2015 at 1:20 pm // Reply

    Wow Brendon, this is extraordinary, you keep growing and going to next, next, and next level. I can sense how vibrant, wise, intuitive and inspired you are!! Just to be subscribed to your channel and have the opportunity to drink from this fountain is a blessing and something that goes on my gratitude journal. I was already drowning myself into my “negative perspective” of reality and just by watching the first 2:05 min of this video last night, my Sunday night experience shifted completely to a night of amazing love with my husband. And this morning I watched it completely and made my day! Thank You!!!

  4. You articulate your ideas so beautifully. Thank God that I found your work! You’ve really inspired me to be my best self. I talk about this idea presented in the video all the time. Keep the amazing work up!

  5. Watching this over and over again. Amazing and very helpful.

  6. Thank you for sharing this idea. I tell this to people all the time. When you change your perspective, your reality changes around you. 

  7. Nirm Shetty // 31st May 2015 at 5:56 am // Reply

    great stuff. this guy sacrifices so much to change lives. hero

  8. your positivity is so inspiring and contagious and gives me incredible amounts of inspiration to become more positive about everything

  9. SunshineSurfsup1 // 28th June 2015 at 2:08 am // Reply

    Amazing!!! Brendan, you are the first person who has helped me blend my religion with a spiritual approach while complementing my belief. Thank you so much! I’m entering the super charged life after years of being lost.

  10. please tell me a thing. how come some people do not face any ups and downs in their life? i know that its not possible to see the things they face, but some people do not face any problems, and on the other hand some people like me are facing problems in each and every hour of their life. i just wanted to ask that is it my destiny or i have any chance to get over it? i will really appriciate if you give me some advice 🙂

    • Cynthia Lowry RE // 10th February 2016 at 1:40 pm // Reply

      +Abhilash Bhattacharya I understand what you are saying. Experiencing some very difficult challenges and am also very aware that this is temporary. Already things are changing, not as I expected but unfolding in miraculous ways. Keep your faith, keep your eyes open to goodness. Keeping you, Abhilash, in my prayers.

    • thank you soo much. I really appriciate your statement. 🙂

  11. Grace Robinson // 23rd October 2015 at 10:50 pm // Reply

    How to not care what other people think ??? Answer that please

  12. It sounds good but I find it difficult to apply. Lets say a specific example: you lost a child, what could you possibly tell yourself to not drown in negativity and reframe it in such a way you are able to go on with life or that constant reminders dont make you lose your mind

    • Smart Cat Collar Project // 18th June 2016 at 10:29 am // Reply

      Remorse is useless most of the time. If you are certain you could have done something to prevent it to happen, then learn the lesson so that you can be more cautious next time with someone you love. Else you are losing time.
      I know many people who lost their child and joined weird organizations, sects, etc, (mostly after losing their first child), but these took all their money away ! After losing their child, their lost their life and the life of their family for generations !
      So most importantly, do not let emotions over helm you, do not overreact. Pray, meditate, do something for yourself, something positive that you like.

    • phoggee right people think it’s so easy to get over things not just things traumatic things too

  13. Jerome Forman // 7th April 2016 at 10:31 am // Reply

    So true, our perception = our reality. the key word is OUR reality, not those imposed upon us by others. We are the masters of our minds and our bodies and we can control what we put in it. Great topic Brendan.

    • Jessica Pastura // 27th April 2016 at 8:50 pm // Reply

      Yeah. The key thought here is to realize that reality is not a fixed thing, it’s always an interpretation of the facts. As Brendon said there is no fact we don’t attach meaning to it. So defining reality in helpful ways is choosing good and empowering meanings to attach to it! I think people find that difficult because we can think: am I a naive person seeing everything on the bright side? It’s not real! Like this is faking reality, reality is not that beautiful fairy tale. But if we think a little bit more we can notice that this thought too is just a result of a pessimistic interpretation of life that most people choose and we learn from them. Unfortunately it’s more frequent than the positive, happy and empowering interpretation of life so it can trick us making us think that’s the most wise way of thinking just because that’s where the majority lays. Yeah… Thinking differently is a challenge, because of the herd behavior humans tend to have. But if pay attention and realize that the majority is unhappy, unfullfilled and unmotivated we became sure that the wise atittude is, in fact, not to follow.

  14. neo robertson // 8th May 2016 at 10:23 pm // Reply

    We all basically have that power that Neo has at the end of the Matrix. We create our Reality with our perspective

  15. You are very kind person Brendon I hope one day I will see you pal

  16. this is very close to the truth but still so off, intense realism is the only truth, you cant puff up the reality w positive thinking so that you can accept it, its just as bad as being negative, you fear nothing more than the sober real truth, not negatively not overly positive, so at the end of the day your a fool,

  17. Can you do one for anxiety

  18. accept what is. let go of what was…and have faith in what will be.

  19. This is really great. Thank you!

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