Digital creator Dylan Marron has racked up millions of views for projects like "Every Single Word" and "Sitting in Bathrooms With Trans People" — but he's found that the flip side of success online is internet hate. Over time, he's developed an unexpected coping mechanism: calling the people who leave him insensitive comments and asking a simple question: "Why did you write that?" In a thoughtful talk about how we interact online, Marron explains how sometimes the most subversive thing you can do is actually speak with people you disagree with, not simply at them.
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For the negative comments, I think the effective method is just forgetting them :-0
Effective method for whom, and what makes you think such a way? Did you ask yourself that before commenting.
Agreed. I think it depends on how personal the attacks are. Unless people know you well, or you’re putting yourself out there on social media, there isn’t necessarily that much of an attack surface.
carefulcarpenter I felt dumbfounded reading this. Thank you
Hoàng Kim Việt i agree with you my friend, you have absolutely right. you must forget them in order to make your life better.
These comments will be great practice
What a lovely perspective!
Oh great, this dunce.
You just want to be on his podcast
Leftism Is Dying atleast he’s got content. I know it’s frustrating that liberals are the defacto voice of the left, but he’s put in the work. Your channel is emptier than Trump’s head.
Jeff Crumpler can’t be too empty, seeing as how he’s president. I mean, you could probably do better
damn guys you really showed each other
Leftism Is Dying At least you admit people could do better than Trump.
8:57 is what the world really needs to hear and understand… well done and thank you for sharing
SIGMOND Yes, thank u TED
“Empathy is not endorsement”.
Listening to others requires others to express their inner feelings and intellectualization of these feelings. Empathy is not an intellectual manifestation. “Actions are greater than words”.
The internet has afforded intellectual listening but not emotional listening as far as true empathy is concerned.
“I love my car”— this is _philia._
“I love my customer”— this is _philia._
“I love my children” — this is _agape._
“I love my neighbor’s children” — this may be _pedophilia._
“I love my ex” — this is *_marerophilia._*
Empathy in action is compassion. Compassion is what we do to express our emotional feelings of empathy. We spend time— not with our car, or our customers while playing golf at the country club course. Compassion is going to the park with your dog and spending time with both your dog and the other lonely people who share the love of pets. Going to a golf match or race track is not compassion but can be viewed as empathy.
Alchoholics are not expressing empathy while spending time with other alchoholics. Compassion is going cold turkey and spending time with the homeless down near the local bridge.
This presenter has likely never spent time offline sharing soup with HIV victims.
My take-away: “Empathy is not endorsement.”
Robert Shaver that is true
This was a nice Ted talk.
Great performance piece. Ted talks has gone downhill
https://www.ted.com/about/our-organization
He never became popular, but his videos are infamous for their dislikes.
having just popped over to his channel to see for myself…. yup. This was a good talk, but his channel though.
“Simply talking with them.” This needs serious bravery. Bless you.
YES CARLOS ♥
Amandaxxcastilho thank you
+Amandaxxcastilho I pity the fools that don’t get this reference. (No, not the one I’m making. Although you get an extra point for getting mine.)
NICE SPEECH DYLAN !!!!!
“I thought that the real way to bring about change was to shut down opposing viewpoints with epicly worded essays and comments but I learned those were cheered on by those who already agreed with me.” GROUND-BREAKING revelation. Truly.
Just retitle the video to “Millennial liberal learns how to cope with disagreement and criticism.”
Kudos to him for getting there, at least. Many people our age would block you for expressing a less-than-progressive opinion, rather than have a debate or conversation.
…the same place, if I read your sarcasm correctly..
David Boucard I’ve not seen his content, but that’s not even important because the main focus in this speech is not about his political views.
Lorenzo – Really? The part where he talked about “unboxing” police brutality, masculinity, and mistreatment of Native Americans didn’t ring any political bells for you? Nor did the part where he talked about the trans bathroom issue? The comments he received were in direct response to his expressed political views online. That is indeed the context. Some were slurs but some were mere disagreements, which he lumped together, in his “Conversations with People Who Hate Me” Podcast
David Boucard Well said.
David Boucard He just said he made videos on those topics, he didn’t talk about the issues themselves.
Let’s talk ….Hahaha……Nice work!
“How I feed the trolls (and that’s a good thing).”
I really liked this talk
“Empathy is not endorsement.” Wonderfully said. I once phrased a similar understanding as, “I am an individual not the institution.” People forget that. Ideas are to be challenged and it’s much better to address the topic and not the person in almost all cases.
“Don’t feed the trolls” was always the most obvious advice when dealing with mean comments on the internet.
People leave you alone if they don’t get a reaction out of you, or if you show them you’re not bothered at all.
It’s weird that normies don’t understand this and would rather escalate things.
carefulcarpenter First guy says “normie” and the second sounds like a gay kindergarten teacher. Time to remove both of you from the gene pool.
Matt Roszak You start out making a good point and then you stoop to a label like “normie”? Why? It almost feels like you’re trying to do what your post says to see if people can leave you alone and not have a reaction to you.
You might be onto something.
Matt Roszak ‘Onto something’ in that you wanted to see if anyone would react either way?
If the trolling really doesn’t bother you then why go to such lengths?
But he didn’t say it didn’t bother him — he said at the very beginning that it bothered him fairly deeply at first and it was hard not to give it a second thought?
In the hopes that he can educate someone to be more open-minded and less cruel?