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SUMMARY:
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What happens when you feel apart and disconnected from others? When you feel alone, what do you do?
1. Get interested in others. Ask others questions and engage in their life. In being present with them, you'll feel more connected and so will they – soon they'll want to hang out more. Challenge yourself to reach out and bring your best self to social interactions.
2. Plus-1 your interactions. Bring just one more person out with you, for lunch, to the movies, etc. Enlarge your social sphere by adding just one person more and the odds increase that you'll find someone to connect with.
3. Be more explicit about what you want, need, dream of. We feel lonely because we don' think people understand – and they probably don't because we haven't authentically and consistently expressed ourselves and our real thoughts and dreams. Don't hope people understand, help them understand.
4. Be honest with yourself and others. Why are you dissatisfied? If you don't know the answer to that, get some help – a counselor or coach. Have real conversations with people about your feelings and needs.
The world doesn't see a lonely person and say, "Let's hang out." It takes the lonely person to have the courage to say, "Here I am. I want to engage again." Challenge yourself to serve more, to share your voice. to connect, to be satisfied, to cheer yourself on even in the times of darkness.
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ABOUT BRENDON
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Brendon Burchard is one of the most watched personal development trainers in the world, and a Top 100 Most Followed Public Figure on Facebook. Over 50,000,000 people watched his videos in the last 12 months, more than 30,000,000 see his posts every week on Facebook, and 600,000-plus students have completed his online courses or video series, making him one of the most successful online instructors in history. A #1 New York Times, #1 Wall Street Journal, and #1 USA Today bestselling author, his books include The Motivation Manifesto, The Charge, The Millionaire Messenger, and Life’s Golden Ticket. Brendon is also the star and executive producer of the #1 self-help solo series on YouTube, and his podcast The Charged Life debuted at #1 on iTunes.
After suffering depression and surviving a car accident at the age of 19, Brendon began asking himself important life questions: “Did I truly live today? Did I love? Did I matter?” His intention to be happy with the answers led to his breakthrough and life's work helping others “live a fully charged life.” By the age of 32, he became a #1 bestselling author and a multimillionaire as an early pioneer in the online education space. Since then, he has dedicated his life to helping others find their charge, deepen their motivation and strength, and share their true voice with the world.
Larry King named Brendon "one of the top motivation and marketing trainers in the world." SUCCESS Magazine named him as one of the Top 25 Most Influential Leaders in Personal Growth and Achievement, along with Oprah, Deepak Chopra, Joel Osteen, Wayne Dyer and more.
Meet him at Brendon.com.
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ABOUT THE CHARGED LIFE
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The Charged Life is a weekly self-help show full of #motivation, #inspiration, and #high performance strategies with bestselling author, motivational speaker and High Performance Academy founder Brendon Burchard. Filmed in one take, without any notes or prompter, the show has become one of the most viewed direct-to-camera self-help series in the history of Youtube. It has also been the #1 Podcast in all of iTunes and is regularly in the top podcasts in Self-Help and Health categories around the globe. Subscribe to the free motivational podcast here:
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I am very alone…since I have my breakup
Things will get better for you! There is hope and once you learn how to be alone, you’ll love it. You can find happiness with your families and good friends! I wish the best for you and I know you’ll find happiness 🙂
+YourAnonymousGuy hey im in the same place, just takes a little while, been 3 months for me and its finally getting better
+Khamal D Thank you !
+playNsleep Thx.
YourAnonymousGuy at least you someone to breakup.
I usually feel the third type of lonelyness because my belief system changed and people around me are still “there”. This video encourages me to be more authentic, share my new beliefs, accept to be vulnerable and be honest with myself. That feels great. Thank You!
+Daniela Cunha Being honest will always bring long term value to yourself and the people around you. Happy for you.
+Daniela Cunha Love it! Sharing your new beliefs and being authenticamy make you feel lonely in one way, but also surrounded by those who share similar values. It’s all about sharing those values so that others can connect
🙂 thank you
I feel with you the intrinsic and fundamental truths of the universe have left me utterly alone. I urine for human connection that values truth…
so do I troy
It’s so true that quantity is not quality … Feeling alone doesn’t have anything to do with the amount of people that you meet everyday… Great video Brendon!
Brendon you always come up with the right topic at right time … how are you doing this ?…
love it…thank you
Thank you so much, I needed this right now.
BamBams moose yeah me too
Thanks for Sharing.
Some of us just don’t like people.
Yeah
Ranjani Narayanan
“we’ll make a threso- We’ll make it three.”
haha
+Dustin O’Daffer
it was a quick catch
Sleuth rofl
I am so happy that I choose to watch this video at this point in my life. I cannot tell you how valuable your words are. It’s hard being an introvert, but I’m consistently trying to bring the best of myself to each interaction, and engaging as much as possible. It is lonely, but it will be less lonely the more we share and put ourselves out there.
+h3arty Its possible to get out there as an introvert. There are actually some advantages that we have if used properly. I’m an introvert and I speak and have my channel so its possible to switch out of quiet mode!
Great message.
1.) Love the message to create deeper engagement. We have to take time to process that we are connected and if we aren’t, build the connection.
2.) That we need to stop using being an introvert as an excuse. We can serve people if we come out of ourselves.
3.) We could be one person away from building a strong connection. I issued a challenge to myself and my viewers to speak with strangers this week and that we could be one person away from getting what we want in life.
Great video!! They are always wonderful, you inspire me ! You know Brendon, I really think that so many of us have become accustomed to feeling sad and/or depressed. We have become comfortable playing this victim role and so in essence we “enjoy” feeling lonely. It takes deliberate action and intent to shift our mindsets to feeling good. It is always our choice and once we begin to see that we can then set ourselves up to repel feelings of loneliness as you mentioned.
Thank you so much for this. A video has never explained something so personal so accurately. I’m sure you have seen lots of these comments but I want to truly thank you for this. You hit topics that effected me and my loneliness. Thanks for this. I think I’m going to start doing something instead of hoping for something.
+Echo Hawk yeeeeeeeea
You helped me today so much… I can’t find words to thank you
What if you have literally no friends? Ever? Literally
Talk to someone. Don’t be afraid to say something. From your failure you’ll succeed. So don’t worry and just try harder next time and next time. Or start with small talk with easier people like your colleagues rather than strangers. Don’t be subject to that. Change it.
I can be yours 🙂
hello new friend(s) 🙂
I’ve been with the rest of my family for 3 months and to me it felt like a year, i had so much fun with them then i had to go back home because of school and i was crying about that for weeks man i miss them so much
I wish i can give you a call, best video ever. better than motivational speech video. simple & clear
; your story isn’t over yet
I can be trying to talk to my classmates and i am usually ignored or unheard of because of my indrawn nature of being quiet and afraid of starting conversations and speaking to people i don’t know, well because of the feeling of failing miserably…
I personally feel alone because of a very strange reason. Because I’m far far to aware of myself and the big picture and the world and I can’t stop myself from fully analyzing everything and realizing how real everything is. And I’m a total realist and im a good person and im a hard worker and im confident and I’m not easily hurt or knocked down at all and I have strong unique opinions and I don’t feel the need to explain my choices to those who don’t understand and I’m also humble aside from all that and I know I’m a tiny tiny speck in this universe, let alone this world. And I’m 12 years old. And I’ve never met someone my age that can just be a good person and get away from the drama and not get ahead of themselves with relationships. And I have friends, but they are all just, 7th graders. I don’t have anyone that actually truly can just laugh at how scary this world is like I can. I know I have much to learn and I am just a kid but if people in my school could just say that exact thing alone, it would help a lot. I don’t get very good grades and I’m not a perfect person and I still realize when I make mistakes and I’m not looking for someone that is perfect and I’m not saying I am. I just want someone who is my age, that can just be nice to people and choose wisely because they know that this is their only life and they have one chance. That was a bit of a ramble but I just can’t find someone. I haven’t given up yet though.
I can relate with you.I have always been that kind of kid since(now I am 18).It is hard to find people to really connect and for wise surreal conversations
Sunny YesItsMyRealName don’t give up! I’ve always been like you (24 now) it doesn’t magically get better, but with time comes more experience and opportunity and if you might not have thousands of friends, but as you get older you’ll meet many different people that’ll be a lot more like you than you thought 🙂 keep doing your thing and just try to always be yourself, kind and put heart and soul into everything you do. All the best x
Priya Shrestha, I am exactly the same as you. Exactly as you just explained in your comment. The only difference is that I’m 24. Do you want to talk? I don’t have any friends. I’m very lonely. Would you like to be my friend?
I’m just so alone, I am a positive person in general but they’re times when I feel heavy and alone .. the last time I’ve been in good time with a friend was in 2011 .. I am not even a social person
since 2011 I lost all my friends
literally I don’t have any contact with them and since being alone for such a long time I became worried about going out…
Anonymous Writer, I admit that I do feel lonely, sometime I wish I could find a real good friend, but it’s so hard to find just one. You are lucky at least to have found a few friends, I wish I can find one good friend. In
the past, people only hang out with me because they want my help, after I help them, they stop being friend with me.
So now I am being alone, and you are lucky to have a few good friends. It’s nice to have good friends.