In a powerful talk, educator Eldra Jackson III shares how he unlearned dangerous lessons about masculinity through Inside Circle, an organization that leads group therapy for incarcerated men. Now he's helping others heal by creating a new image of what it means to be a whole, healthy man. "The challenge is to eradicate this cycle of emotional illiteracy and groupthink," he says.
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All the alpha male bs has completely spoilt the perception of masculinity. Too much wrong information in the media !
It’s all CNN’s fault
The Freedom Universe found the beta
+HarzerKäse You mean the second in command in society?
@Milky Tea You got everything wrong about alpha amales there was to get. Ironically, TED has a talk from a scientist of alpha males so look it up and educate yourself. Being alpha in chimps is about SOCIAL WORK, not about being the strongest and meanest, chimps like that are ostracised and often end up dead. Alpha males need to be first and foremost empathetic because their job is to make sure everyone in the group is content, which includes tickling the babies and consoling the hurt ones. It’s been observed alpha males do more “emotional and empathetic tasks” than any other male. Alphas also need extremely good connections and social skills because often times it’s the older, well connected males who make a chimp a new alpha. It’s not about who has the biggest muscles and lack of emotionality. It’s not unlike human politics.
As for “lacking judgement due to emotion” You have a fundemental lack of understanding that *emotion is a crutial part of human decision-making process.* Even more crutial than logical evaluation of the available options. Look up what neurocience has to say about the role of emotions in our decision-making, look up cases of humans with brain damage who cannot access emotions and how these people have virtually STOPPED being able to make the simplest decisions like picking a restaurant. ALL human decisions are at their core made at an emotional level. Our brains are able to logically evaluate to a degree, but in order to make the “final decision” the brain defers to emotional response – what “feels” right.” Without this step the brain is perpetually locked in an endless evaluation cycle. Your sense of masculinity and “alpha” is very emotion based as well and your inability to even recognize it is ironic to say the least.
TED fans should have their mental retardation clinically diagnosed. They’re emotional thinkers and pseudo-intellectuals who believe they’re logical.
What about the lack of masculinity? The chances of you committing crimes is statistically higher without a father in your youth.
+Gloria Thomas Term invented to feminize real men
+Shen Storm I’m not misrepresenting your argument son. I’m quoting it verbatim. Maybe you should do some learning before you come at me, son. You don’t reject data that doesn’t fit the premise. The data is the data. When the data doesn’t fit your premise it is your premise that is wrong. Not reality. There. Now you are ready to start a scientific method class at an elementary school level. Good luck! But really you aren’t bright enough. You should stick to some liberal art.
+Veins “Yes it is mostly womens perception. It’s not a 50/50 case.”
Okay, we were discussing opinions — you don’t need to support opinions with evidence. Now you’ve made a *claim.* You should only make claims when you can support it with evidence.
Can you please provide evidence that toxic masculinity is based mostly a women’s perception?
Anything empirical would be great.
“barely anyone uses terms like “Beta” and “Alpha” in a non sarcastic way in 2019.”
You obviously don’t hang around the right-wing. Take a look at any popular right-wing personality and take a look at the comment section. Heck, take a look at the comment section in the Gillette ad.
Take a look at the_donald, or /pol/.
If you only hang around lefties, of course you’re not going to see those terms used unironically.
I’ll ask my question again, because you didn’t answer it.
“tyrannical patriarchy”
What do you mean by that? And are you talking about a small demographic of Tumblrinas?
I’ll answer your question after I know what you’re referring to.
+Optical Clarity Jesus you’re dense. I can tell no amount of explanation is going to get through to that pea brain of yours so I’m just going to leave it here. Farewell, molecule mind, may our paths never cross again.
+Shen Storm my density is roughly that of water as I can demonstrate in the pool any day. But one lesson you really need to take home is rejecting all data which doesn’t fit your premise is the opposite of science. Maybe someday you’ll grow up enough to understand that. But honestly I doubt it you don’t seem like you’re bright enough.
Another attack on manhood. I’m not apologizing for being a man.
what exactly is he saying against manhood?
+KrazyKain no? NOTHING???? That’s what I thought. Keep your identity politics to yourself. No one cares. Thank you and good bye: -)
You: ‘Poisonous apple’ = ‘apple that is poisonous’
Also you: ‘Toxic masculinity’ = ‘REEEEE manhood is under attack’
Your understanding (paradox) of how adjectives work, shows how shortsighted you are. What a bunch of weak snowflakes you are. My condolences.
+Robbi rob No one cares, apart from the thousands, if not millions of trans people and all their allies? go back to your cave troll.
I’m sorry you’re a man
Masculinity is completely different from doing right and wrong. Masculinity has nothing to do with you committing serious crimes!
+Genevieve He was raised in a culture of stupidity. It’s toxic stupidity that is a problem. He was also probably raised by a single mother. Most criminals come from single mother homes.
+Nicholas Hogan I see a person who couldn’t make it in society and blames anything he can instead of taking responsibility for his crimes. He should still be in prison.
+Brenda Rua Brenda, Brenda… So willing to throw anyone with a different opinion under the bus… Sad. Gtfoh
+Eryxias Did you watch the video? He was raised in basically a “traditional” family dynamic. Father, mother, brother and sister. He says this in the first 2 minutes.
Comments on this are going to be interesting…
+KrazyKain why would you hide stupid people though?
+KrazyKain oh you mean transphilic bullshit? good (((they))) should be removed.
Liberal Democracy – the best in removing everything and everyone – good fucking job.
+MajkaSrajka Ever heard of the Paradox of Tolerance?
+KrazyKain
I did – but what if you are a madman who think that MAGA hats are the same as hoods of the KKK?
On top of that – “tolerance” is not enough nowadays – nowadays any different behavior towards anyone (any PoC) is deemed to be racism, even if it doesn’t encourage any intolerant actions? Is there a line to where “Tolerance” ends, and people being assholes are just people being assholes, where you don’t have moral high-ground to doxxing them and harrasing their bosses?
By “dangerous lessons” does the speaker mean wholesale fraud such as the pop psychology of the idea of “toxic masculinity” particularly where the speaker won’t admit that femininity would therefore, necessarily, exist on a comparable spectrum and that “toxic femininity” is therefore just as much a thing? Like that?
The few diseases he refers to of the toxic masculinity is things the old man says to the young one
The last 2 generations of men have the best advice there is.. men should strive to be them and not this Progressive Delusional Weak individual the world is trying to make men into.
Let’s educate our gen z’s before they grow up to become weak like millenials. Otherwise they really will just become post-millenials!
The grate problem of our society is the lack of true man doing things true man should do. Protect, lead and help.
+Jesper Bergendorff what?
+EnekonGaming Ok, but there are women who don’t do things true women should do like look after their children. Instead they are now too focussed on their careers which makes it harder for men to protect and lead because there is more competition. You are reinforcing gender stereotypes by saying that men should be the ones to protect and lead.
+Oak101 Say that man should protect, lead and help his family isn’t any stereotype. It’s his obligation as a man. Of course, I’m with you. It’s true that women aren’t doing their job as well. And that’s why society is in trouble, family as we know is disappearing. Everyone is just looking for his own safe. And because of it, we have this new “feminists” and stuff. If only everyone played their role and take their responsibilities, everything would be better.
+EnekonGaming Yeah, I agree.
I like turtles
+Bunny *bruh*
sounds like toxic masculinity. how does a trip to a re-education camp sound????
+Echo Chamber Infiltrator all expenses paid, all you have to do is murder someone, apparently.
I like rabbits
Hottest take
Weak man=weak nation.
+quewn tenerif men need to prepare for people coaching women to lie and cry wolf when something doesnt go their way…
Strong men=911?
+quewn tenerif You’re being crazy to speak for all women. Your hate and resentfulness will only make your own life miserable.
+Eryxias If that makes you sleep at night…
But what defines a weak man? I would argue that certain behaviours one considers “weak” are actually the stronger and harder choice
Funny, I was raised with the same things, “Shut up before I give something to cry about!”, “Stop being a cry baby.”
I’ve never committed a crime and I’m a woman. Raised my kids similarly and they have never committed crimes and their closer to 40 than 30 these days.
You sir, are the criminal not a masculine man, don’t blame your upbringing.
+Lola Eizenhoefer You kind of missed the entire point of the talk, and I don’t mean to be preachy when I say that flinging mud on someone like this isn’t going to make the world a better place. The valuable but overlooked point he brings up here is that when individuals replace their identity with their idea of masculinity, because they’ve never reflected on themselves and their actions, problematic consequences follow, even up to societal scale. That’s what’s worth discussing here, and it actually goes both ways in that replacing identity with femininity is equally problematic, though it may lead to different kinds of problems. At the very least, the take away should be that some of those sentenced to a life sentence can in fact be normalized and integrated back into society, should they be willing, while remaining conscious and repentant of their previous actions, for which this guy seems to be a prime example.
+Jesper Bergendorff Let me begin by saying it was not my intention to throw mud at him or anyone else, I was merely stating my opinion.
Yes, his story of how he turned his life around is inspirational, I would never look down on someone like him. Nor anyone else for that matter, it’s not my place to judge others.
However, my opinion remains the same, each individual is responsible for their own actions. The idea of someone doing something because they blindly followed others thinking is an excuse. If your IQ is above 75 you should be able to discern things for yourself, not follow like a sheep.
I do understand that my opinion may differ from others on here, but it is just that, my opinion.
+threaker thot He’s not an expert to say for sure that the problem was in his masculinity. His opinion is just a guess of an ex-criminal. The main problem of all criminals is the lack of responsibility and idiotic “alternative” life style.
ah, the good old “if it didn’t happen for me it doesn’t happen for others regardless of the evidence”
Lola. Go study psychology. A person with a rough childhood is way more likely to commit crimes.
Robbery, kidnapping, and attempted murder are completely different then taking pride in being a man.
Masculinity is protecting your wife, daughters, and family. While teaching your sons the same.
This guy is institutionalized.
+nick111138 from what I’ve seen men are not only a threat but also delusional.
He wasn’t talking about masculinity in general. He was talking about his wrong view of(on?) (sorry, I m not the best english speaker out there) masculinity that made him commit those crimes in the past.
+flower power You really need help.
+flower power who hurt you?
Still waiting for a TED Talk about something wrong/bad bout feminity
+Sothis Women being a primary force behind perpetuating FGM wouldn’t surprise me in the least. Like how male relatives are one of the main forces perpetuating routine infant circumcision in the US, which ironically got it’s start because Dr. Kellogg believed it would reduce masturbation by reducing sensitivity and if done close enough would make erection uncomfortable — literally to control male sexuality. He also promoted burning the clitoris with carbolic acid, but that didn’t really take hold.
I’m sure they have one. The pressures to perform femininity can be just as harmful as toxic masculinity traits. I would argue that almost impossible beauty ideals and the pressure that comes with can do a lot of psychological damage to women, just like how men withholding their emotions can be just as harmful. This is about working together to look at certain standards of both femininity and masculinity to see which ones are harmful to ourselves or others.
The idea is that it isn’t an attack on masculinity, it is a commentary on some of the harmful behaviours that may occur from setting certain “standards” on what it means to be masculine. Same thing happens with femininity.
+aman how many times do you hear ‘toxic femininity’ compared to ‘toxic masculinity’? I’m curious to know.
Dack Hacksaw not as often, of course, because I believe we have talked about it differently and it manifests in different, possibly more discrete ways 🙂 there are constant commercials telling us we need to look better, look younger, etc. In order to perform a certain level of femininity. I would say this has a certain psychological impact that can harm others and themselves, but mostly mentally (gossip, judgements, low self esteem), which aren’t always obvious.
On the other hand I’d argue that toxic masculinity may manifest in physical, violent behaviours as well as psychological harm and therefore can be more obvious.
“Toxic femininity” has of course been a thing for a long long time (same with any harmful gender stereotypes or expectations), we just have never referred to it that way. Though it certainly needs to talked about just as much!
+Caden Thompson did you ever read their book?
So when is the talk on Toxic Femininity?
Toxic Femininity: gossip, character assassination, manipulation, cruelty
+quewn tenerif Just a long list of baseless, evidence-less, assertions. I love it. Keep it up. The fundamental denial of biology by people like you, the blank slate notion that masculinity and femininity were created out of whole cloth, only helps to show the radicalism associated with your ideology.
+Dooker T my ideology? lol What’s my ideology? Why are you trying to pretend you understand what I’m saying when you can’t even read properly? I clearly said that the idea perpetuated by mainstream feminists that men are essentially good but corrupted by society (social construction -> toxic masculinity) is naive. And femininity was created. Nothing to do with biology. Whether you like it or not.
Echo Chamber Infiltrator – and female domestic violence against men (I’ve been physically assaulted by two women, despite myself never laying so much as a finger on any female).
A lot of comments here about not apologizing for being a male or for masculinity. If that’s the comment your about to leave, maybe listen again. He’s not saying masculinity or being a man is bad, he’s trying to tell you how to be a better one.
ISN’T IT FUNNY HOW THIS COMMENT IS HARDLY LIKED, BUT HAS SLOWLY CREPT TO THE TOP OF THE COMMENT LIST. MAKES YOU WONDER……………ABOUT THE AGENDA.
Make Brooklyn – I wouldn’t compare this man to a condom. A condom is far more beneficial to society.
TheManHimselfRangers (((The Agenda)))
+Bunny Not really, they didn’t stop you from getting herpes, warts, or syphillis. ya know
+Bunny exactly bunny
Why does Ted keep doing this to themselves? Lol
Every man that’s annoyed by this leftist propaganda is another vote for Trump. Enjoy another 4 years libtards!
+Bunny Thanks for the info on the owner. It makes sence.
What are you guys talking about? The man opened himself up after being through so much and you guys don’t even care. What does that say about your own character?
+SubZero Where did anyone say they don’t care? I think most are saying that whatever this guys notions are about what he perceives masculinity to be, most men don’t share it. Him claiming, by mere assertion, that there is an “epidemic” of “toxic masculinity”, is why there is a push back. Most men are brought up to be providers, protectors, and defenders of the weak and those in need. Just look at who is doing the carrying of other human beings after a flood or natural disaster. That is what most men are brought up to be, and its no surprise that they resent being told that this guys version of masculinity, is their own.
Because TED has been invaded by Intersectional feminists just like universities and the tech industry
I’m AfroAmerican and he is right. This is said in the community and I heard the phrases but that is also by bad parents who didn’t do their job. I stayed from all the crap he speaks of and I am making it through life just fine. I agree some men acting out always angry isn’t good and I just laugh at those people because they are not really tough. We as a whole need to go back to traditional masculinity.
Toxic masculinity? Seems more like toxic criminal culture.
Toxic actions and behaviors are the problem…
It is not masculine nor is it feminine!
level Joe I’d agree.. but I think the fact certain acts/perspectives are more common in men (violent crime, emotional withdrawal) may suggest a link to a certain (male) expectation. Just like how eating disorders are more likely to occur in women, most likely due to unhealthy (feminine) standards.
Gotta nip a problem in the bud by getting to its root cause :p
In the U.S, over 90% of incarcerated adults are male [1]. This statistic suggests a special proclivity in maleness towards negative or sociopathic behaviours, which are absent or reduced in females. The pyschological literature shows that men are higher in trait disagreeableness, linked to negative or antisocial behaviours [2]. However, based on figures from 2013 [3], incarcerated males account for approximately 1.6% of the male population. Is it fair, therefore, to attribute what are extreme and rare behaviours of men as manifestations of masculinity? Or, is it more accurate to describe these behaviours as linked to extreme forms of disagreeableness; a trait, which, to a lesser degree, is also found in the female population? Are female prisoners also compelled by toxic masculinity? As a proponent of individual responsibility, I would urge caution before attributing specific behaviours to gender or racial groups. I believe it is wiser and fairer to look more closely at the specific causes for criminality rather than to attribute such proclivities to masculinity, femininity or ethnicity, while accepting that there is something in maleness which is more disposed towards sociopathy.
[1] https://www.statista.com/chart/11573/gender-of-inmates-in-us-federal-prisons-and-general-population/
[2] https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3149680/
[3] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incarceration_in_the_United_States#Gender
John Legar these are interesting points, thanks for sharing sources. I think it’s also important to note the root cause(s) of this “extreme and rare behaviours” (criminal activity) as you put it. For example are there common behaviours in our culture that could stem from those traits more common in men, that aren’t necessarily criminal? For example can physical bullying or harmful expression of emotion increase the probability of future behaviours that can lead to prison time? These are also questions that should be looked at in research